Drifting

Drifting away from friends or just losing them altogether is a pain that cuts really deep. It seems like it takes a lifetime to fully be okay with the reality of the situation and to heal from being hurt. It's frustrating. You try to analyze things and look for areas where you could have done things differently. You may even try and reach out without any success. The pain cuts deeper.

I know it hurts. Losing friends is never easy. I look at pictures and realize that out of the five people that are in it, only one person is still active in my life. In some cases, I still don't know why they left. Often, I start blaming myself; assuming that because it has happened multiple times that I must be the common denominator. But sometimes things just happen. It may not be your fault. People change. Unfortunately. People who used to know every little detail about you don't even know the dreams that you are chasing now.

Things are constantly changing. You stuff so much time and effort and energy in relationships, and sometimes they don’t work out. If you are truly doing all you can to be a great friend, then don’t let that deter you from continuing to love on people. My mom has to continually remind me not to let my heart get hardened. Sometimes I feel like it’s all a waste. What‘s the point of forming deep bonds with people if at any time they could walk away and every moment, laugh, and dream you shared together would just be a memory?

I couldn’t tell you how many tears I’ve cried about this topic. In just this week, I’ve cried more than I would like to admit. But it’s In these moments that you have to take a step back and remain grateful for the lessons and moments shared with people who left, but direct your time and energy to the people who are still here. You can never tell someone enough how much you value them and how much you appreciate them being in your corner. Let them know they are valuable to you and that life wouldn't be the same without them. Hold on tight to the people you love and express your gratitude for them because things may not always be this way.

(And this portion is here for BJ so that he knows I mentioned him. You're welcome.)

Thanks for hearing my heart,

Kae